Friday 17 April 2009

Fun in the Pub

Jez let Di's dog out to have a crap late one night.

He watched the football on TV, and then suddenly remembered to let the dog back in. When he opened the door, he was shocked at what he saw! In his dog's mouth was his neighbour's cat, dead!

"Bad dog! BAD DOG!" shouted Jez. He took the cat away and looked at it. He couldn't bring himself to tell his neighbour what happened, so he decided to clean it up and leave it on the neighbour's front step.

He took the cat into the bathroom and washed off all the blood and dirt. It took him forever. He had to wash it four times to get it all cleaned. He brushed it's beautiful white fur as he blow dried it, and put its collar back on.

While it was still dark, he crept into the neighbour's yard and laid the cat down on the porch in front of the door.

The next day, he was on on the pub carpark cleaning up the piles of 'doggy-do-do' when he saw his neighbour was outside. "Morning!," said his neighbour.

"Hi," replied Jez, nervously.
His neighbour said, "Something weird happened last night."
"Yes? What's that then?" asked Jez, sweating now.
"Well, my cat died yesterday, and we buried him. This morning he was lying on my front porch!"

. . . . . . o0o . . . . . .

Boom! Boom! Not really, It's just a joke to make you smile, and no doubt to get me another thumping from Di!

10 comments:

ChrisB said...

Groan but I'm still laughing.

Keith said...

You were quick off the mark! I hadn't finished writing it when you commented. What's the matter, couldn't you sleep? Pffft!

neena maiya (guyana gyal) said...

Haha, either a thumping from Di or she's going to let fierce little Charlie bite you.

Unknown said...

You are dead! And you missed her birthday yesterday!

Keith said...

John - Oh merde! Do you think she will let me have a last cigarette before the execution?

Karmyn R said...

I saw that joke coming!!!

Richard Wintle said...

You know, it's amazing how much time you can spend blow-drying a dead cat.

Said too much.

Wendy Ascham said...

"This is the front view!"
I think you will be getting a bottom view of Di's foot when she sees that picture!

Keli said...

LOL, you had me...but only for a second ;)

thepinkdog said...

LOL!!! Haven't heard this one before! (sorry I'm late to post but just getting to reading them now) ; )