Pub news.

Di, our everso lovely soaker landlady accidently got pissed again the other night.

"It wasn't my fault!", she protested. "Whose fault was it?", I enquired, somewhat bemused at this statement.

"They kept buying me wine", she replied. "But you didn't have to drink it all in one night", I replied. "No, but....er...it would have been rude not to".

As the evening wore on and the drink kept flowing, mother nature kicked in and a trip to the loo beckoned. Stephen, one of the locals was locked in conversation with Di. "I've got to have a Pee", he says. "Me too", says Di, "I'll come with you".

In the GENTS, Stephen is stood at the urinal, Di is sat in the cubicle still talking.

"God, I sound like a carthorse having a piss", she blurts out. Stephen nearly wets himself!