Tuesday, 22 May 2012

Joke Tuesday.

Wine and Water

To my friend who enjoys a glass of wine.. and those who don't.

As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria found in feces.

In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop. However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, whisky or other liquor), because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health . Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.

Thanks to Beccy.

9 comments:

Hannah Joy Curious said...

Jeez John, way to pimp the science! Judging by the state of my insides (gluten and dairy intolerant, fully veganized and yet uncomfortable most days), I'd almost be tempted to follow your advice. Then again I am an alcohol-free zone.

Instead of imbibing, I find that fermented foods - such as kimchi, kombucha and tempeh - keep the internal ecosystem functioning. Admittedly, some contain a trace amount of alcohol so we're kind of on the same page, even though I'm only a footnote. :-)

john.g. said...

Hannah, I'd suggest eating meat and wearing leather, you'll feel better!

© Karelian Blonde said...

*LOL* Duly noted!

Jayne said...

I'm rather anti-alcohol & its a very rare sighting if I'm seen with a drink, BUT, when I have kidney trouble (mainly from dehydration) I drink a beer. It makes my kidneys work so much better than water??! After 2, I'm anybodys, but that's totally irrelevant!

OldLady Of The Hills said...

Well put, John....And Funny, Too! LOL! Though I am more of a water drinker than anything else...so, I guess you could say, I'm full of s**t!!

john.g. said...

Naomi, LOL!!

john.g. said...

KB, you're safe!!

john.g. said...

jayne, I'll buy you three!

ChrisB said...

I enjoyed this one John LOL- now Embee is gloating cause I'm the one who drinks water and he...well you can guess what he drinks!!!!