Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Joke Tuesday.

Invest carefully:


If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago,
you
would have £49.00 today.


If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you would
have
£33.00 today.

If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago,
you would have £0.00 today.


But, if you had purchased £1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all
the beer, then turned in the aluminium cans for recycling refund, you
would have received a £214.00.


Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink
heavily & recycle.


A recent study found that the average Briton walks about 900 miles a
year.

Another study found that Britons drink, on average, 22 gallons of
alcohol a year.


That means that, on average, Britons get about 41 miles to the gallon!

Makes you proud to be British, doesn't it?


7 comments:

Dumdad said...

I practise what you preach! Hic!

john.g. said...

Dumdad, so do me and my Dad!

Keith said...

I've just worked out on my abacus beads that you personally get about 165.5 miles to the gallon! That must be a record.

john.g. said...

Keith, you are missing a bead or two. Go see a doctor!

Keith said...

Sorry, I got the decimal point in the wrong place. It should have been 1.655 mpg.

Pat said...

No way am I drinking beer. It's fattening.

john.g. said...

Mum2, so is wine, but, hey-ho!