Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Joke Tuesday.

Bloody fantastic. A firm with a sense of humour, at last.




A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a Xmas fancy dress party. He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem.







A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:




Dear Sir,



Please find enclosed a Pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a Pirate.







The man is offended that the outfit emphasizes his disability, so he writes a letter of complaint. A week passes and he receives another parcel and note:







Dear Sir,



Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and with your bald head you will really look the part.







The man is really incandescent with rage now, because the company has gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head. So he writes a really strong letter of complaint. A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with the accompanying letter:







Dear Sir,



Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup.



We suggest you pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your bald head, stick your wooden leg up your arse and go as a toffee apple.

18 comments:

petra michelle; Whose role is it anyway? said...

Now that was hilarious, John! :))
I can now face the challenges ahead with the endorphins having been satisifed! ;)

john.g. said...

Hiya, Petra Michelle!

ChrisB said...

hehehehehehehe

john.g. said...

Chris,I just knew you'd like that!

thepinkdog said...

LOL! Excellent joke! Keep 'em coming!

john.g. said...

I'll try Caroline!

Anonymous said...

MOTEL
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居家看護
法拍屋
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隔熱紙
高雄縣旅遊
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Blazing said...

Boom boom ;-)

#Debi said...

Not just a firm with a sense of humor, but one that actually responds to correspondence! Amazing! :D

PI said...

Deelicious! Can you blame 'em?

Anonymous said...

簡善琳瑜珈補習班創辦人簡善琳老師,在三十幾年前瑜珈風氣尚未盛行的少女時代即對它產生濃厚興趣少時體質贏弱敏感也因瑜伽而獲得顯著改善,所以立志貢獻所學,藉由瑜珈來達成幫助國人身體健康的願望。高雄瑜珈中簡善琳瑜伽養生會館除了硬體設備在會館環境上建立最精緻、最優質的多功能複式場所外,為避免其他瑜珈教室之師資情況(即投入教學工作則無力再學習進修之窘境),對於師資的培訓與要求更是不遺餘力,所有師資不分資深資淺每個月都要接受新的瑜伽課程訓練,期盼與國際接軌,隨時給予學員最新的資訊與知識。針對初學者教授九大關節操、拜日式、基本功法、淨脈呼吸法等,溫和而緩慢的瑜珈,透過簡單的延展動作及呼吸按摩身體各部位的經脈,奠定初學者學習瑜伽的基礎。會館裡有初級瑜伽、整體瑜伽、哈達瑜伽、養生瑜伽、有氧瑜伽、塑身瑜伽、氣功瑜伽、瑜伽提斯、Ashtanga、孕婦瑜伽、進階瑜伽、體位法瑜伽…等數十項豐富瑜伽課程提供選擇。

john.g. said...

Anonymous, piss off or use English!

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL....Good One, John! I love jokes with wonderful Mental Images...!

Anonymous said...

簡善琳瑜珈補習班創辦人簡善琳老師,在三十幾年前瑜珈風氣尚未盛行的少女時代即對它產生濃厚興趣少時體質贏弱敏感也因瑜伽而獲得顯著改善,所以立志貢獻所學,藉由瑜珈來達成幫助國人身體健康的願望。高雄瑜珈中簡善琳瑜伽養生會館除了硬體設備在會館環境上建立最精緻、最優質的多功能複式場所外,為避免其他瑜珈教室之師資情況(即投入教學工作則無力再學習進修之窘境),對於師資的培訓與要求更是不遺餘力,所有師資不分資深資淺每個月都要接受新的瑜伽課程訓練,期盼與國際接軌,隨時給予學員最新的資訊與知識。針對初學者教授九大關節操、拜日式、基本功法、淨脈呼吸法等,溫和而緩慢的瑜珈,透過簡單的延展動作及呼吸按摩身體各部位的經脈,奠定初學者學習瑜伽的基礎。會館裡有初級瑜伽、整體瑜伽、哈達瑜伽、養生瑜伽、有氧瑜伽、塑身瑜伽、氣功瑜伽、瑜伽提斯、Ashtanga、孕婦瑜伽、進階瑜伽、體位法瑜伽…等數十項豐富瑜伽課程提供選擇。

Anonymous said...

網路行銷
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john.g. said...

Who's the anonymous pest?

Wendy Ascham said...

Looks like you will have to add 'Comment Moderation' to your comments. I know it's a bloody nusiance, but at least you can delete twats like Anonymous before their silly rubbish goes on your site.

Dad told me that joke a long time ago, obviously he told you as well!

john.g. said...

Wendy, hello! Actually he didn't, but it is an oldie!