Tuesday, 29 January 2008

Joke Tuesday.

Now, I need you to clear your minds of all obscene thoughts!

A 95 year old man is given a jar to provide a sperm sample for analysis at hospital. He returns two days later with an empty jar.

The nurse asks why he hasn't managed to supply a sample.

"Sorry", he says, "but I tried with my right hand, then the left hand! Then my wife tried with both hands! Then with her mouth, first with her teeth in, and then with them out! Then we asked Ethel from next door to have a go.

It was no good.

We just couldn't get the f*cking lid off the jar!!

Now, you didn't think that, did you!!

13 comments:

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

if he were really that old and his wife were still alive, he would have had millions of empty jars at home to use. After all, old people collect these sort of things.

Unknown said...

Hi, Merms!

Duck said...

good one!

SpanishGoth said...

And if it had been Di (your landady) - she would have forgottent the fucking jar :p

(can't ban me as I don't drink there!!!)

Pat said...

That is really funny. Horrible - but funny!

Unknown said...

Mum2...xxxx

Mr Farty said...

Mrs Farty LOL'd!

Unknown said...

Groan!

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Hey john. Actually I've just spent 10 mins stabbing a jar of pickled cabbage.
1) I must be old - can't open a jar
2) I must be really old - I am thinking of eating pickled cabbage and sleeping on it - I'll be trumpeting like the Dawn of the Judgement day in the office tomorrow.

Cind said...

Laffin' 'ere.....funny for a Tuesday ;-}

Beccy said...

No I didn't but then a certain someone I know frequently sends me rude jokes!

Unknown said...

Merms, bastards aren't they? Worse after eating! Poot!

Beccy, now then!

Cind, ta !

Minx, !!!!!

Jayne said...

Now why on earth would you presume your readers have 'obscene' thoughts John? We're a nice bunch of homely people (all together now folks "yeah right"!!)
The joke was crap, but I like the bit about the teeth in/out!