Tuesday, 20 January 2009

Joke Tueaday.

This is from my friend from Scotchland, Mr. Farty. Thanks, Mr. F!






Frank Feldman...

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, 'Perfect timing. You're just like Frank'


Passenger: 'Who?'

Cabbie: 'Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.'

Passenger: 'There are always a few clouds over everybody.'

Cabbie: 'Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.'

Passenger: 'Sounds like he was something really special.'

Cabbie: 'There's more... He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right'

Passenger: 'Wow, some guy then.'

Cabbie: 'He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.'

Passenger: 'An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?'

















Cabbie: 'Well, I never actually met Frank, he died. I married his fucking widow.'

13 comments:

Dumdad said...

Good one!

john.g. said...

Hi, Dumdad!

petra michelle; Whose role is it anyway? said...

Ouch! hahaha! Hindsight is always 20/20, isn't it?
Have a wonderful day, John!

john.g. said...

Thanks, Petra, you too!

Mr Farty said...

LOL that's absolutely brilliant!

(well what did you expect me to say?)

ChrisB said...

I think I've used that one on Witty Weds. it's v.funny.

Keith said...

Frank Feldman eh? He sounds a lot like me.

#Debi said...

Keith: you mean dead? :)

Good one, John!

Keith said...

Debi - You have wounded me deeply!
I get insulted in the pub by the cripple, and now insulted by my cyber-friends. . . I'm going to the "Dog and Gun" to get pissed!

© Karelian Blonde said...

*smirking* dont mind that lot Keith. You could be Frank...

little wanderer said...

love a good laugh and that was a good laugh cheers John, oh yeah i am making a come back...........again!

Brom said...

I think that was your best yet!

Jayne said...

This I really must send to me dad! I'll tell him it's from you & that you're already in a wheelchair...... :-)