Tuesday 17 February 2009

Joke Tuesday.

FEMALE/MALE





Eight words with two meanings.

1: THINGY (thing-ee) n. Female.... Any part under a car's hood.
Male.... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2: VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football with only three defenders.

3: COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. Female.... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male.... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4: COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n. Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male.... Trying not to hit on other women whilst out with this one.

5: ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n. Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male.... Anything that can be done whilst drinking beer.

6: FLATULENCE (flach-u-lence) n. Female.... An embarrassing by-product of indigestion.
Male.... A source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.

7: MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n. Female.... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.... Call it what you want, just as long as we do it.

8: REMOTE CONTROL (ri-mot-kon-trihl) n. Female.... A device for changing channels on the T.V.
Male.... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

20 comments:

Keli said...

LOL, 3, 6, & 7 are my faves!

Unknown said...

Hi, Keli!

Anonymous said...

LOL! So true... so true!

Unknown said...

Hello, Caroline!

Anonymous said...

LOL...love it! Thanks for sharing, John!

Unknown said...

Chris, you're welcome!

ChrisB said...

LOl even though I've seen some before and I know all about no 8!

Beccy said...

Spot on John!

Unknown said...

Hi, Beccy!!

willowtree said...

It's been said that a woman wants to see what's on TV, whereas a man wants to see what else is on TV.

Unknown said...

He,he WT!

cynicalgirl said...

ha! All too true, especially the remote control part.

Karelian Blonde said...

*yawn* I am glad I am single ;)

Anonymous said...

THIS will now make the rounds in Swissland as well,good one John!xx

Anonymous said...

LOL, those were good!

Pat said...

My #1 son had just been here and drives me mad with #8.

Jon M said...

Number 8 is sooooo true!

sallywrites said...

Brilliant - as always. Your jokes are the best:)

I've Been Mugged said...

You've got me worried now.

I laugh at my own farts - does this mean I'm changing gender?

Murfomurf said...

What a crazy man! The TV remote thing- I've actually got Spotrick trained and it didn't take long- I just showed him that he did the same thing as his dad and he was so mortified he seemed to stop surfing all of a sudden! Try it, girls! (wink) ;)