Wednesday, 11 February 2009

Pub nonsense # 4 cont.

Where was I? Oh, yes, loosening tongues.

On Valentines night Jez and Di, our-ever-so-gorgeous soaker landlady are hosting a quiz night based on the Mr. and Mrs. game show. I'm sure they did this last year and had a lot of divorces fun.

Anyway, Di was doing a bit of surveillence on a few newcomers to the poker game to see if they would like to come to the quiz.

"Hello, love, have you got a girlfriend?" she enquired of one of the youngsters. "No", he said. "Thought not." she replied.

Jez is covering his ears!

There was a less than attractive lad playing. "Have you got a girlfriend?" she asked. "Yes, I have", he replied. "You DO?" she said.

Have you got a girlfriend?" she enquired of another young lad. "No, I've a boyfriend", he said jokingly. "You're gay then?" she said, "We have a few come in here, you'll be alright!"

This should have appeared in the first posting, but I forgot.

Jez went out to do various tasks, banking, etc. Di asked him to get her some foundation from the chemist (drug store for my American friends). "I don't know what to get.",he said. "But I'm going to the hardware shop, would a bag of cement do?"

This pub is the best!


Keith said...

Are you insinerating that Di needs some Polyfilla or something to hide the worry lines in her face?

If she does have worry lines on her beautiful face then it's probably people like you that have caused them.

You should be ashamed of yourself! Di doesn't need makeup really. How can you improve on perfection anyway? She always looks so fresh and young.

*more fawning*

Dumdad said...

I really must visit this pub one day!

john.g. said...

Keith, you moron, it was Jez that said that! Do keep up!

Dumdad, you will be welcomed!

Mr Farty said...

Mr & Mrs is great. There's a great story about it somewhere or other. Have fun!

Keith said...

Ah! Jez may have SAID it, but you were THINKING it, and that makes you just as guilty as him!

I've told Di that she musn't thump you anymore.

She's got to save up the bashings until I'm there so I can watch. . . Well, it's best to get them all over at once ain't it?

Jon M said...

Sounds like the pub to be in!

PI said...

Who needs a cabaret when you have Di?

ChrisB said...

You get some brilliant blog fodder from your pub.

Sally said...

Cement would smooth out any wrinkles of course... Hope the quiz is fun and doesn't end in too many divorces!

john.g. said...

Hi, Sally, good to hear from you!

Guyana-Gyal said...

Did she tell him she wants a hammer, and when he brought it, she klunked 'im?

john.g. said...

GG! hi, sweetie!

Anonymous said...

秋葉原 メイド
ペット火葬 つくば
つくば ペット火葬
つくば ペット霊園
つくば ペット葬儀
soul source production
ベトナム シーフード
高収入 アルバイト
高収入 アルバイト
アパレル 求人
アパレル 派遣
人妻 出会い
性感マッサージ 名古屋
M性感 名古屋
I wish you always happy and success in your life.
Thanks for sharing!
Best regards!

john.g. said...

Anonymous, fuck off!