Wednesday, 5 November 2008

Joke Wednesday, for one week only!

OK,OK,I forgot! There's been a lot going on in the Greenwood household these last few days and I thought yesterday was Monday!

Right,joke time!

THE ONION AND THE CHRISTMAS TREE.

The family is sitting at the dinner table. The son asks his father,"Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?" The father, surprised, answers,"Well son, there's three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties & forties, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions." "Onions?" "Yes, you see them and they make you cry."

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter says,"Mom, how many types of 'willies' are there?" The mother,surprised, smiles and answers. "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willie is like an Oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thities & forties, it's like a Birch tree, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?"















"Yes dear, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only!"

Apologies for the COCK-UP!!!

12 comments:

Sylv said...

FIRST!

Thats a really good one,and almost asks to be forwarded to all and sundry:) Sorry to be so lazy and boring on my blog,but i am kinda rushed to get ready for my great 'London alone' adventure. You sure you still don't want Keith to push you down to meet me :)?

john.g. said...

Not practical Sylv, unfortunately!

Grumpy Keith said...

NOW who's being subtle! You just upset all the male bloggers over 50 that read your blog - both of them, and all of the lady bloggers no doubt. . .

PI said...

I seem to have missed the thities period:)
BTW the Duke of Kent's daughter's nickname was Melons.

john.g. said...

Mum2,LOL!

ChrisB said...

LOL good one John!

Mickle in NZ said...

Well worth the wait - LOL

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

LOL, LOL.....Good One, My Dear John!

#Debi said...

Nicely done! And looks familiar...

Duck said...

Your tardiness is forgiven. Love the joke John

john.g. said...

Hiya, Duck! Long time!

#Debi, ta

Jayne said...

LMAO, very funny John........another one for me to forward to my dad, who will in turn ask me where in the world do I find such crap!