Tuesday, 14 August 2007

Joke Tuesday..#2

A very loud, unattractive, hard-faced woman walks into Safeway's with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The doorman says, "Good morning and welcome to Safeways, nice children you have. Are they twins?"

The fat ugly woman snarls: "Of course they bloody aren't! That one's nine, and the other's seven. Do they look like twins you dickhead?"

"Absolutely not," replies the doorman, "I just can't believe anyone would shag you twice!"

12 comments:

Keith said...

Very good. I'm surprised that the woman would have got shagged at all. Perhaps she shut his guidedog outside at the time...

ChrisB said...

I won't comment about the joke hehehe!

sablonneuse said...

Good one John.
Reminds me of a particularly nasty headmistress I once worked for - a middle-aged spinster. One of the school governers said she needed a good shag but you'd have to put a bag over her head first

Beccy said...

Brilliant!

john.g. said...

Thank you!

SpanishGoth said...

But when she got back to her car, the tyres were flat.

Not because I let them down - fat bitch did it all on her own

john.g. said...

Nicely Goth!

SpanishGoth said...

btw - you're on the list now - day late but I'm a lazy Goth and I don't want the blame for the freaks that follow the link....

Brom said...

I like it!

(Disclaimer: I found your blog via New York and not via the Goth's... Me a freak though??... on a good day, maybe!)

PI said...

We never get wit like that in our Tescos.

Minx said...

John! Thats aw.....very funny.

irreverentmama said...

You know why we laugh at this, don't you: it's because we've all seen this woman, and all had the same thought...