Amazingly simple home remedies.

I don't usually like back to back posts, as once people have read the original they rarely return. But Keith didn't tell me he was going to post here, although he has my full permission to. A good post it was too! So, this is to check my theory.

1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat, and presto, the blockage will be instantly removed.

2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself whilst slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them whilst you chop away.

3. For those of you with high blood pressure,simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes. Don't forget a timer!

4. Avoid arguements with the wife about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take laxatives. Then, you will be afraid to cough!

7. Have toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget the toothache.

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:

You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct tape.
If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
If it shouldn't move and does, use the Duct tape.

Remember:

1. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
2. Never pass up the chance to go to the bathroom.
3. If you woke up, congratulations: you get a second chance.
4. And finally, be really nice to your family and friends: you never know when you might need them to empty your bed pan!!