Friday, 25 May 2007

Back to normal.

What a scream i've had today!

For the sake of simplicity Australian voices are in capitals. (loud).

Dad dropped me off at the pub as usual. Horror! Six Aussies sat at my table. What to do? The landlord shrugged his shoulders.
"Excuse me guys, do you think i could move to this corner of the table, it makes things easier for me.
NO BLOODY WORRIES COBBER.

"Thanks a lot".
They were playing darts, badly. I put the cricket on.

CHRIST, NOW HERE'S A SPORT YOU POMS CANT PLAY.

Why did I put the cricket on?

YOU LOT WERE CRAP IN THE WORLD CUP.

"Yes".

They were a good lot, who, I discovered were over for a wedding. The landlords sister was marrying one of them.

They kept passing my beer to me when I needed a refill, and we had a good laugh.

The darts didn't improve, the alcohol consumption did! Dad arrived at 3pm and I got up, shook hands with them all.

"Two things i've learnt about you guys!"

WHAT'S THAT?

"You convicts cant play darts for shit!!"

"And you're a great laugh!".

PISS OFF YOU POMMIE BASTARD.

My bar bill? Nothing, the convicts bought the lot!!

10 comments:

Beccy said...

Worth the insults then!!!

john.g. said...

Absolutely, Beccy. We had a right laugh! I like the Aussies because they don't mince words.

ned kelly said...

Jesus Christ! And I missed out on all that free booze! Why didn't you phone me, Blue?.. I'd liked to have met those colonials with their big fat wallets.

Oh, sorry, you haven't got my number.

PI said...

Yay for Ozzies!

Keith said...

Pi - I can't comment on your blog, they wont show up! But I'm still reading it.

zoe said...

john - i've nominated you for big blogger. mwahahahaha.

PI said...

Keith you must find a way. Wendy's clever. Ask her.

john.g. said...

Ned, anything for free!

Zoe, I'm speechless!

Pat, they are fun.

ChrisB said...

That sounds like one lucky 'pommie bastard' to me!!

john.g. said...

Chris, language please. This is a respectable blog! (cringes).